Be Patience with each other
teaches that the relations between the spouses should be based on
tranquility, love and mercy. These are very important concepts in Islam.
These three summarize the ideals of Islamic marriage. It is the duty of
the husband and wife to see that they are a source of comfort and
tranquility for each other. They should do everything physically,
emotionally and spiritually to make each other feel happy and
comfortable. They must care for each other. They should not inflict any
harm or injury, neither physically nor verbally, to each other.
order to increase the tranquility and comfort in their relations and in
their home, they should love each other and should have mercy and
kindness for each other. Loving and merciful relationship is an
important ingredient of a good marriage and good family life.
Islamic marriage, neither the husband is allowed to demand his wife
what is forbidden by Allah and what is harsh and unseemly, nor the wife is allowed to demand her husband to do anything that Allah has forbidden and what would put undue burden upon her husband.
are two things that many enemies and even some Muslims refer to when
trying to show that Islam in some way favors the men over the women.
This has caused very serious problems within and without for a number of
centuries but never so much as it has now. The first is the mention in
the Qur’an that the (Men are in charge of women.)(An-Nisa‘ 4:34) That,
however, is meaning not in superiority, but rather in responsibility.
The man must care for the woman. His mother, sister, wife and his
daughter are all charges that Allah has placed under him. He is
responsible for their food, lodging, health care, education, clothing
and general well being. He must be very careful to provide for his
family to the best of his ability. There is no doubt that this is the
meaning behind the message of men being “over” the women.
wherein the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said that if he
could order anyone to make prostration to someone other than Allah, it would be the wife to the husband.
the meaning is easy to manipulate for those who desire to misunderstand
the true spirit of Islam. Women do have a responsibility to obey their
men, whether their fathers, brothers, husbands or even grown-up sons.
But it should be emphasized that this obedience is actually to the deen
(religion) of Allah and how they follow Islam. The Prophet (peace and
blessings be upon him) used to wash his own clothes, cook food, clean up
and care for things just as anyone else. Try to recall anytime when he
ordered his family around like slaves. Did he? Of course not. This is obviously against the teachings of Islam.
owns property in Islam exclusive of her husband and does not even have
to offer one cent of her income to her husband even if he is out of work
and has nothing. Whatever she contributes is recorded for her as
charity and it is not obligatory on her. If she washes his clothes,
prepares special dishes and does extra things for him, then this is
considered very appreciated acts from her
side. He should be very thankful to Allah for giving him such a wife.
Her duties are always to Allah first, and then to the Prophet (peace and
blessings be upon him). Her duties to her husband are no difference
than the husband’s duties. Both are equal in responsibilities, duties
and intentions before Allah.
Allah Almighty knows best.